Not loud by nature

I'm not loud by nature

Unpublished / performed once at a spoken word event
Written 12 Jan 2009
By Jasmine Low

Some nights, I wish I was lightning

A startling flash of light, unnerving and unafraid of consequences as I strike

But I'm not so bright

Or, thunder, that offers no compromise in its loud and crashing sounds

as they hit the surface of the black tar road along Jalan Raja Chulan

But I'm not loud by nature

I could dance up the beautiful steel structures of the KLCC

like the sensual winds of the South China Sea

But I’m not so graceful

I think of the Monsoon rain, fierce and unrelenting,

bravely descending upon the city lights at Teluk Chempedak

like how I wish I could stealthily approach you

But I haven't

I could display these attributes the way Mother Nature intended

If I was born during December, the last month of the year

A time of reckoning, madness and forgiveness

But I wasn’t

So I bask in the consistency of the constant rays from the full moon

And instruct it to shine down upon you when you’re asleep

And I call upon dawn to come just as you’re about ready to rouse

And invite the caustic sunrays to seep moisture from your skin

Leaving you thirsty

For me

I am as vast as the ocean

And as faithful as the perpetual rise and fall of the waves beating across the shores,

I place my wishes in a bottle, hoping it’d reach you in the next continent of your mind

But this constant chase between the tides tire you

And we find ourselves inside a chamber that is as dark as the darkest night

To find only each other and nothing else but a faint flicker of our shadows

A glimmer of light from a tiny red light bulb 20 kilometres away

Gather glimpes of my hungry weekends

I sleep a deep slumber

And awake midnight

And chase your light

At the end of your lifetime,

You will realize that there may be a thousand lightning bolts,

A million decibels of thunder

Endless windstorms

would have picked you up in their passionate haste

But there’s only one of me,

And it is my consistency

That earths you

And it is this resonance

That lasts forever

For you.